Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Time is Up

Here it is... maternity leave over. To be honest I don't know what I am going to do tomorrow. I  know as I know my own name I will not be thinking about hair. I kinda feel sorry for my clients tomorrow. I have a full book tomorrow so hopefully I will just stay super busy. I have very mixed feelings about going back to work.
I thought I would be one of those mom's who wanted to work.... then maybe work part time. But now the more I think about it (all day long) the more I could just stay home with my girl and be totally ok with it.
I am usually getting ready for bed right now or in bed but I can't seem to get myself to go in the room. I don't want today to end because that means tomorrow I am away from Amelia. I am sure so many of you moms know what I am going thru...... right now it feels like pure hell. I am crying just thinking about dropping her off and driving away.
The times I have left Amelia, she just cries and cries.The main thing that I worry about is that when Amelia gets mad she gets MAD.... and it takes her awhile to calm down. Thankfully these moments don't happen very often. Mostly when she is sleepy or not feeling well. I am so afraid she isn't going to be good for Candace. Sweet Candace is keeping Amelia for us. She is such a wonderful friend and a great Mommy. I know she will be great to Amelia. I just hope Amelia can figure that out. Little A is such a momma's girl. Deric will pick her up and keep her for about 2 more hours. He is such a good daddy..... they will be fine.

I am only working part time thankfully. Wednesdays, Fridays, and Saturday. I am not sure if I could handle anymore than that. Shoot, I don't even know if I can handle those three days!
I am not sure I can write that much more because I feel a good sob coming on...... just say a little prayer for me tomorrow. I am working 1 to about 7 tomorrow. The longest I have ever been away from our girl.

No, I don't have a picture to post tonight..... sorry.  I am sure I will have some of  tomorrow


2 comments:

  1. Good luck, Amanda!! I hope your day goes very fast and that you eventually feel good about the days you go into work. I'm sure it's very hard!! Hang in there - I'll be thinking about you!

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  2. I love you sis!! Amelia will be fine - she gets to have playdates with Ana Kate!!! She will have so much fun. I think it will be more difficult on you than it is on her. I'll be thinking and praying for you. I'll text you later - you can do it! You are so excellent at what you do, you make such a difference in people's lives, and you love it so much, you really do need that outlet and some "adult" time. I love you!! xoxoxo

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